Thursday, November 15, 2012

More self-serving stupidity from the self-RIGHTeous

It appears that my last blog post has pissed a few people off, and rightfully so.
You wanted a world like this.
You got it.
Deal with it.
Now, on to the next subject: Christmas shit beginning in September:

To all the conservatives who are whining like a 2-year-old about seeing Christmas stuff everywhere, when it's not even Thanksgiving yet:
Welcome to the world you so desperately desired.
It's called C-A-P-I-T-A-L-I-S-M.
It's that free market thingy which you so vehemently stood behind, remember?
You fell in line with the notion that the free market would correct itself, and this is the result.
Personally, I wish all these places would move into your yard with every light at Q-Beam strength, and music blaring through a faulty-wired megaphone...that way, you could get the full picture of how the rest of us feel about it.
You now have the world you and yours spent several generations voting for, so use up some of that 'personal responsibility' and take some of your own advice:
"Put your big girl panties on, and deal with it."
I think they should start it in July, next year!
Egg Nog and in-season watermelon, anyone?

One more thing:
I would also venture to guess that this whole imaginary "War on Christmas" thingy is now rendered pure bullshit as well, seeing as how I have now broken down your theory on the supposed broken free market.
One can only hope that some day, something will finally click that switch on in your brain, and help you figure out that you have been brainwashed.
You may put your big girl panties on and deal with that one, also.
And yes, Fox News idiots, I'm talking to you.
How stupid are you to believe a network's manufactured "War On Christmas", just so they can make even more of a profit from YOUR stupidity?
This is the world you asked for. 
Are you happy now?
What's that smell?
Ah...There it is.



Monday, November 12, 2012

Now that America has spoken...

The following are some important messages for members of the Tea Party, regardless of which chapter you may be in, and for every corner of the United States.
If you're offended by this, perhaps you need to be.

Dear Tea Party members, nationwide:

The time has come for you to take some of your own advice, when it comes to 'personal responsibility', and accept some cold hard truths about your plethora of mixed messages over the past 4 years, now that America has given you a majority opinion of its own:

It's not Obama's fault that you're an idiot.
It's not Obama's fault that you're an asshole.
It's not Obama's fault that you don't understand basic math.
It's not Obama's fault that you're prone to racism.
It's not Obama's fault that you're prone to being a pernicious bigot, whether or not you realize it.
It's not Obama's fault that you failed reading comprehension and applied logic, when it comes to following the teachings of Jesus Christ.
It's not O
bama's fault that you don't bother to read factual bar graphs and charts from reliable sources on unemployment going down in the past 4 years, stock market value going up in the past 4 years, more terrorists being killed in the past 4 years, and how our constitution doesn't apply to just you but to same sex couples who should have always had the right to marry.
It's not Obama's fault that you don't know 9th grade American history, or the fact that America has never been a 'Christian nation' with 'Christian principles' (see Joseph McCarthy on Google, for more details).
It's not Obama's fault that you think all homeless people are lazy bums who need to take a bath and get a job, when you refuse to hire until Obama leaves office (some of those homeless people are among the approximately 200,000 veterans who will be sleeping on the street, on any given night).
It's not Obama's fault that you hate him more than you love America.
It's not Obama's fault that you give every moderate conservative a bad name.
It's not Obama's fault that you refuse to comb the 'trickle down' fairy dust from your brain.
It's not Obama's fault that you honestly want millionaires and billionaires to pay less of a tax rate than you, when there are a couple thousand of them who don't pay one dime.
It's not Obama's fault that you made him look more appealing to voters age 18-29.

You and your marionettes, now known as Super PACs, have spent one hell of a fortune to turn attitudes and tempers back to 1970, the treatment of women back to 1950, the economy back to 1930, and lost your asses by wishing to double down on your drooling hopes of one man failing.
For the past 4 years, you have stormed town hall meetings and caused physical altercations, you have stormed the streets with all of your guns and misspelled signs, you have harassed homeless people and those with physical handicaps, you have paraded around with a bible in one hand then a gun in the other, preaching to those of whom you feel need it, when it's not your place to tell a soul in this country what to do.
If you want to see a great deal of what's wrong with this country, find the closest mirror and take a good look.
Your incredible ignorance and stupidity astounds me, even worse than what many to the far left of me often do.
And now, you have begun petitioning the White House to allow your home states to secede from the union.
You want to leave? Hire me at a decent wage, and I'll gladly pack your shit for you, close enough to guaranteed that no moving company in this country could do any better, because I know exactly how they take their shortcuts, which is something I refuse to do.
Bottom line: You took this bet, you lost close to your entire ass on it, and now you're whining like a 2-year-old about it. Well, them's the breaks here in America. And, as it was often said in the 60s to all the hippies who protested the Vietnam War: 
And, if you do leave, may Charles Darwin refuse to make you an example of his fine craftsmanship.
You deserve to find out the hard way just what it's like to live somewhere else, especially where people could live in places you wouldn't dare walk into wearing a Hazmat suit, and they will have never had it so good.
Goodbye, good luck, and good riddance to bad trash.
Observe the photo, below.
Remember what happened on September 12? I do. If you don't, Google the date with Glenn Beck's name beside it. That should jog your memory.