Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Frank Zappa: A man crush

**This post will not include a daughter with a certain 'language' from the 80s, so let's not go there.

This is easy, yet complicated as hell. For ages, I have had a man crush on Frank Zappa and probably always will. His ability to come out of literally nowhere, land himself on The Steve Allen Show at age 22, and show Steve how to 'Play Bike', still amazes me. That was in 1963.
Fast-forward only 5 years and he's on BBC. But not just a plain ol' "Here's another batch of hippies and their short-lived tunes" kind of thing. It was an ensemble that literally tore it up, in my humble opinion....and for all who truly know me....if there's one thing I have plenty of, it's opinions.
Fast-forward 2 more years and he's with the likes of Theodore Bikel, Keith Moon, Ringo Starr, and the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra putting together one of the most outrageous, acid-laden movies of all time, "200 Motels". If you haven't seen it, take something or at least drink plenty before going there. Otherwise, it wont be as good an experience. In fact, I can see how watching it sober could cause seizures. (wink)
Fast-forward 3 more years and you have one of the coolest and most sarcastic takes on a love song I have ever heard in my life: "Dirty Love"
Fast-forward another year and something epic gets recorded....one of the titles which is used quite commonly to this day: "Don't Eat The Yellow Snow". Also, "Stinkfoot" is hillarious.
Fast-forward 11 years beyond that and you get the best thing he ever did, which was sit calmly and rip a panel of lawmakers to shreds during the infamous PMRC hearings.
It's a shame that Dee Snider gets all the glory. Of course, Twisted Sister was quite 'out there', at the time. So, Dee Snider made the perfect punching bag for the typical, smug-assed doo gooder white man on Capital Hill. But, watch those clips on YouTube. I assure you, Dee Snider's performance was nothing even close in comparison.
Truly, Zappa all but lactated talent; Writing, composing, arranging, recording, producing, and even doing things which other groups were given credit for, later in time, when it was HE who did it first. So to you, Lou Reed, who called him "Talentless" way back when: Boy, were you a dumb shit or what?
I like The Velvet Underground, but those guys couldn't even come close to the multi-layered levels of one genre, let alone fusion, being extrapolated by Zappa on an almost daily basis because the guy was literally a workaholic.
The problem: He was so far ahead of his time that people either didn't get it, or considered him to be out of his mind crazy (Yeah, crazy like a fox), or even full of shit. Either way, none of those accusations apply. He was just one of many freakish talents who came once in a lifetime, did his thing to a point which put the word 'extreme' to the test, succeeded, and died. He did more in 30 years than most people do in their entire lives, at least 3 times over.
In between all the music and behind-the-scenes work was a mountain of philosophy, some of which is so simple and to the point that it's scary. There are plenty of websites with lots of quotes from him, as well, some of which are pee in your pants funny and others that are worthy of applause.
My favorite: "A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it's not open."
THANK YOU!!
To think that with all he did, all he accomplished, and yet didn't even believe it was important nor did he care how people remembered him after he passed away. On top of that, his burial site has no marker or tombstone. How's that for humility?
Did I mention his uncanny ability to predict, well over 20 years ago, exactly what's going on now?
This sums it up. Does it ever. Man crush indeed. Tell it, Frank! Love ya....


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